Some times in Love to lose your balance is a part of the Living
Is part of the beauty. to open your heart & cellular self to the
chance just to the chance is growth in & of it's self.
there are times where no one will truly understand. There are times when others will
judge your decisions on life based solely on things that they have undergone
(or on the contrary have never under gone at all).
What they had under gone well....It
It might not be relevant at all to what you are doing, but they will mirror it against
what you are undertaking. Others may be protective, untrusting of what you are
trying to do. They will want proof that you will be ok in your descission. They
want you to be clear, even when perhaps in life they themselves have not been
able to be clear ever....
Goddess have I analyzed my life... I have sunk to the depths of the heart of pain
I have become one & sat within the core of the pain, owning it, clinging to it
Not forgiving myself of things. I have stagnated myself within this .
To think of myself as the ice cube in the glass floating slowly melting really was
for me to realize that I had to trust the melting process of my own life.
I know that Spirit has always sent me guides...but, sometimes in life you forget to
really listen to those still places within. It is then the breath of wisdom that fills your lungs
so deeply that you physically can feel an inner ache . Such breath stretching your
lungs further then you ever thought they could possibly stretch. This is growth,
a mandatory calling from Spirit that "It is time"
While aknowledging my life , the hills, valleys and even the highest mountain peaks
I could see there was more life to live beyone the horizon. A calling magnitized
me to believe I could undetake a journey to rekindle my life.
So I took out firstly to find where I could grow, for a place that would feed my
thirst as well as nurture my soul.
What came forth was Colorado. For a woman who spent the majority of her
life in the Inland North West as well as many times near the ocean this was
indeed a calling for change, but when you get a higher calling you fallow it
down to the letter. First I set out to weed my life of many things that would
hinder the chances for a successful outcome to this journey. I began looking
within at myself, at thing that I had not forgiven myself for, things that had
left scars upon my heart and found such a rushing of healing. some of this I was
able to blog, but other parts I had to work through on the inner.
so here I sit pondering the last of the paving of this road. Still there are things
to do. a legal battle on the horizon which could spin us to Colorado with not
much time to say goodbyes. Sad fact is a Realtor does not want you living on
the property if you had to sue him no matter if he was in the wrong.
Thus we have had to create a plan A,B,& C.
So still there is waiting but...while I wait I shall clean & pack and I shall be
ready for when moving day comes
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